Dear Neighbor (it seems somehow wrong to put your name on the Internet) So, we'll just call you G-Dog.
Dear G-Dog,
We can't believe you are really moving, though we'll believe it when we see it. You come back everyday to move about 2 boxes at a time and leave your van and sometimes dog here, so I have a feeling the process could take awhile. Meanwhile, we will be reflecting on how much we will miss you. Life can get too predictable sometimes..unless you have a neighbor like you. We never knew what was going to come out of your mouth or what event we'd get to watch you do through our windows. I'd now like to recount some of the highlights...
There was the time (yes only one in 4 years) that you decided to wash your car. Looking back it totally made sense to do it your way. You emptied an entire bottle of dawn dish detergent on the top of your dry car. Then you used your (our borrowed) hose to run water over the top of your car creating mass bubbly chaos for about an hour until the water ran clear. No need to wipe, scrub or actually do any work. Meanwhile using the maximum amount of water possible, mind you it was during a severe drought. Filling up a bucket and using a rag like the rest of America just wouldn't do. Besides your way ends with the gleaming roof that no one sees and the dried dirt on the tires and rim of the car, almost as if you had never washed it.
It was always fun when you got the urge to do yard work about every 1.7 years. That one time it was so cold when you decided to blow your leaves, I'm sure you hands would have been freezing..IF you had not thought to plan ahead and wear tube socks on your hands. Yeah maybe it was a little hard to maneuver the on and off switch having no fingers, just a blob for a hand, but you were warm, and it warmed our hearts too.
One time we came home to you standing in our carport wearing jean shorts, no shirt and...SKI GLOVES. Why the gloves? Oh, because you were hunting for a roly poly for your daughters school project. I'm sure there weren't any in your yard. And the ski gloves proved to be a little tricky to pick up the tiny roly poly, didn't they? But after the socks-on-hand incident you were definitely going to wear the gloves you no doubt got for fathers day.
When you needed to expand your Drive-Way you could have hired a professional, but of course not. You just mixed up quick-crete in a cooler (no bucket handy I'm sure) and spread it inch by inch with a small spackle spreader. Too bad quick-crete dries almost instantly, and it was pitiful that your parking pad crumbled the first time you parked there. Although it did come in handy when you inherited your dad's broken down car that sat there for 9 months.
After living in a house season after season things loose their luster. Like your chain link fence. Good thing you thought to get boo-koos of silver spray paint and spray 1/4th of your fence to make it shiny again. Those cans ran out really quickly didn't they? It was also an added bonus for us to get to have silver grass for a couple of weeks.
When Rainer told your girls he was getting me a puppy a few years back for my birthday they asked him, "Boy or Girl?" When he answered Girl, they ran off, and he got the feeling they were up to something. Three days later they came back and presented him with a list of 87 suggested girl dog names. And 2 days after that they brought a second list with 67 more. They were written as one long sentence, no numbers, just a stream of random names. Some that I remember being highlights were: Pansy, Blossom, Indonesia, Asia, Bruce (what?) Needless to say, we had to choose one of the suggestedd names. And thats where Ginger came from. I personally feel like we should go back to that list to pick ALL future pet names..Rainer might disagree. (Readers- I can only find the 2nd list, but will keep searching for the first because its even better. Regardless, enjoy this one, and feel free to use any of the names!)
Needless to say when we found out we were having a baby we were sure to mention that we had names picked out already. I'm a sucker for kids and probably would have named my daughter something crazy like Gladiolia if another list had appeared.
Another thing that was always hilarious was when you (or your family members) came over to borrow things. My personal favorite being this conversation with Rainer:
G Dog, "Rainman!...Whats up?! You know I was thinking...We should grab a beer sometime"
Rainer, "Yeah, that'd be nice"
G Dog, "Well, you got one?"
Then Rainer came in to grab 2 beers and you stood in the dirt that divided our homesteads and enjoyed a cold one, on us of course.
One night you sent one of the girls over just before dinner time. Here is what she said, "Hi. My dad sent me over. We were going to have spaghetti for dinner. But, do you have some sauce we can borrow?" I asked her if she needed noodles too, but you had planned ahead for that one.
Then there was the time you were sending one of the girls to camp. She ran out of luggage so you left a note when we weren't home, to borrow some extra large leaf trash bags for packing.
But in all seriousness you could not have been kinder to us, always checking in on us, loving watching Ann Edwards grow and of course you did name our dog and all. I really can't believe you are moving. We will miss you, our lives will be filled with a few less laughs and smiles now. Thank you for being the PERFECT neighbors for our first home. We will never forget all your quirkiness or kindness. You will be missed.
Love,
Your neighbors, The Kendies
Friday, November 6, 2009
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I just needed to tell you that I am CRACKING up reading this (at school of course.)Hilarious.
ReplyDeleteOh, G-Dog. We are all gonna miss you. Great post, Lolly, laughed and laughed. xo
ReplyDeleteIs that a list of names or her favorite flowers? Hilarious - my personal favorite is Chrysanthemum (aka Chrisanthimum). That just rolls off the tongue.
ReplyDeleteWhat fun living next to such a colorful character. Thanks for sharing his best moments!
I am laughing out loud!!!
ReplyDeleteThis is truly hilarious.
ReplyDeleteThat was hysterical! I love the list-- Loftie is very similar to Lofton. Maybe we should consider it for our next child?
ReplyDelete