Ours to find

It has been a while. A year actually. So much has happened and I am more in awe of God's plan for our family than ever.  I wanted to update you all on where we are now, and specifically on where we are in bringing our Pearl home. You may want to grab some coffee, and prepare yourself for some run-on sentences :)

A year ago we had not moved spots on the Ethiopia waiting list. I felt like God began to stir in my heart and I had a strong sense that something was changing and shifting. Change is scary for me, but this time I pressed into it all and we prayed about what it all meant. What I felt like God was saying was that there were more children in our family. We began praying about telling our agency we were open to adopting siblings and an overwhelming peace came that told us there were babies, not just a baby coming. In a matter of 3 days, we celebrated what God was up to, shared with some close friends that we were going to talk to our agency about siblings, and another close friend told me that every time she prayed for me 'twins' popped into her mind...I laughed and delighted in thinking maybe Pearl was a twin...then the very next day I found out I was pregnant. That was it, I thought, our twins, one in Africa and one in my belly. Oh, God, you are a funny one. Days later, we received the surprise of our lives to find out we were expecting biological twins.

Our boys came straight from Heaven to us in October.

They have brought more joy and laughter into our home than I could have ever dreamt of. I am learning that a good Father gives you not just what you ask for, but what you did not know you needed. Love found me in a new way when these boys came.

These boys are a double portion of joy indeed. 

So much of my identity was shaped by having two older brothers.  Likewise much of who Rainer is was shaped by having two older sisters. We so thankful that Pearl will have the gift of both two older brothers and two older sisters. She already is one loved baby girl.


Soon after the boys were born God changed the course of our adoption.  I will not go into details in order to honor and protect other Ethiopian adoption families, but for us we felt that God closed that door. I was confused and disappointed to say the least. What I learned is that He is worthy of my trust and my worship even when I do not understand. I went back to when God first put Pearl in my heart, and what I originally felt was that she was our Pearl, our treasure, she was ours to find.  She is a daughter, she is loved and she is of great value, worth searching for.


After much prayer we made the decision to withdraw from the Ethiopia program and transfer to Domestic Adoption. God changed our course and our hearts and we are thrilled to say that once the boys turn one this October we will be eligible to have our family profile shown to prospective birthmothers.  We would love for you to continue to pray with us for our Pearl, for her birthmother and for peace for us as we wait to bring her home. We are looking forward to having all our babies home with us. Many well meaning people have told us to be relieved she isn't home yet because our hands are so full. Yes our hands our full, but our heart is longing for our baby girl to be home, and for our family to be complete. So let me lovingly say to please not tell me to be glad that she isn't home yet, we are ready for her, and my heart has longed for her since God told me of her in November of 2011.

I do not even know how to process and thank the Father that He could have orchestrated all of this, the waiting, the changing of countries, the arrival of Pearl's older brothers, and the continued anticipation of Pearl. I have never been more sure of His goodness, so All I know to do is wait with expectation of great joy. I certainly look forward to the day we hold her and it all makes sense. There is still of course so much unknown about when we will be chosen by our Birth Mother, who/where she is, and so on. We are on the ride of our lives and I am continuing to chose joy and allow myself to be cared for by the Father who is surely taking us to our Pearl, our awaited for treasure.