Where we are...and How we got there

Everything about my mama heart wants to be moving. Wants to be actively walking, no running towards my youngest baby girl. But I am learning that adoption involves so much waiting. We are experiencing encouragement and peace in our waiting at the moment, but Im learning that there are many emotions that are a part of peace. I know that God has us in His cloud of peace, but frankly at the moment it does feel cloudy. We officially started our home study Monday and hit a bit of a bump in the road. What we thought this journey would look like might be very different. But we know that God is good, all of the time, and His plans are always better. So that is where we sit today, in a cloud of peace. Not knowing the next step, not clearly seeing a path set before us, but trusting He will show us when it is time to know. I feel like every ounce of control I thought I had over this situation was stripped from me and I'm once again re-posturing myself in a hands-open place of surrender. Adoption is so beautiful, but so very different than a biological pregnancy, where I could touch my tummy knowing my baby was safe, being nurtured, warm, and happy. I am believing that God will hold our baby girl until we can, but Im still working through the flesh in me just so needing to know she is safe. Bitty suggested that when I want to feel our baby I should touch my heart instead of my tummy. What a sweet, smart girl I have.

I debated even blogging today, but this journey for me is about being transparent and full of joy, so sharing the waiting, the unknown and expectation for His goodness is all a part of it. For those of you praying, we would love for you to believe with us for God to reveal His plan for our family in a very clear and tangible way and to move in ways only He can. So that is where we are...Living in the unknown for now, but focusing our eyes on what is unseen. How about how we got here. So many people ask me how we decided to adopt. My answer feels cliche but honestly I think we always knew somehow that we would adopt. Its been in our hearts for a long time, and recently we had the joy of walking through an adoption with dear friends. We were able to stand with them in the moment their son was placed in their arms and we were never the same. We have had a deep revelation of what it means as believers to be adopted into God's family and the spirit of sonship is life altering. It has been for us and we are believing that bringing our baby girl home will impart the joys of being a daughter of the King to all who meet her. Oh I just got so excited thinking about meeting our baby. I will share more about our journey to this point in a later post, but in the nature of keeping it real who wants to see some out-takes of our adoption announcement photo shoot? I could use a laugh :)